Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Fear Factor

"Follow Me."

Two simple words.

Two simple words that Jesus said to His disciples.

No problem, right? But how far is too far? How far am I willing to follow? It's cool when the warm fuzzy Jesus is telling me to follow Him. It's like, seriously, You want me to follow you? Even though I...You still want me? Cool...I'm in!

But how about now, when life is hard sometimes? When following Him means giving up what I think, what my selfish nature demands, and following Him means making choices that don't come naturally?

Just for the record, I don't like deep water. Or high places. I could never take a cruise, or stand at the top of the Sears Tower. I like to be able to touch the bottom, to know what is under my feet and that it isn't going anywhere.

The other night I had a dream that I was about knee deep in water, but waves were crashing in front of me. I kept trying to dive into the wave and swim really deep, but salt water filled my nose and burned my eyes, and I would struggle back to the top, gasping. I really, really didn't want to go under there.

But, all through my dream, this is what I heard: that you would know how deep and how wide and how long and how high is the Love of God. It's Romans 8:38-39. I would hear this in my struggle to try and stop coming up. But I couldn't make myself stay under the water. In my dream I was missing the chance to see just how deep and how wide and how long and how high the Love of God is.

In my waking, analytical hours, I think God is trying to tell me that I am not fully trusting in Him yet. Yes, the salt water will sting my nose and make my eyes burn. But, in the depths of whatever is out there, I will find God more deeply, more clearly than ever before.

But the question is, will I follow Him, even to places I am afraid to go?

Will you?


  1. ohhhhhh. I so want to convey how this post connects for me, but can't quite come up with the words. I just see my own experience very clearly thru your words (which are superb, as always). You are doing a great job of reflecting the Holy Spirit's work in your life... thanks for keeping at it.

  2. WOW! Awesome post Debbie!!! I can relate. Praying that we will remain submerged in His love, and plan for our lives!