How many times have you been in a place in your life that makes you wonder if you have what it takes? You begin to wonder just exactly what were you thinking when you said "Sure, I can do that."
I had a dream not too long ago that, while it is sort of funny, speaks to a deeper issue. I dreamt that it was Saturday night church, and I was the drummer for the worship team. Three of us were on stage, and I was responsible to keep the beat for the other musicians. There were only a few problems with this, the biggest being that I am not actually a drummer. I had no idea what I was doing. The second problem was that the equipment was a child's drum kit, suitable for my 7 year old.It soon became apparent not just to the rest of the band, but to the whole church, that I had no idea what I was doing. I felt like a fraud, realizing that I couldn't live up to my own hype. I woke up embarrassed, and it is so weird how a feeling from a dream can stick with you.
Even though it's been a couple weeks since I had this dream, I can't stop thinking about it. Dreams can help us process how we are feeling when we don't know we're feeling something. So, based on this dream, and my high school psychology degree, I've got some stuff going on that is probably not unique to me, so let's talk it through. Obvously, I do not feel equal to a task set before me. I am feeling a little unsure and insecure.
And that is a good place to be.
As long as I feel completely sure of myself, confident in my own abilities, I lose my need for God. It is only in recognizing where we fall short do we leave room for God to act. His abilities know no limit, and He never lacks for confidence. He never wakes up wondering if He is going to screw something up today.
I am grateful for an opportunity to serve in a way that I know I can't do on my own. Standing on His promises reminds me that His Word that He sends out will not return to Him empty, but will accomplish that which He purposes and succeed in the thing for which He sent it.(Isaiah 55:11) I know that when the Holy Spirit fills me, I will be His witness to the ends of the earth, including Waukesha, Wisconsin.(Acts 1:8) I know that when He called the Hebrews to build the tabernacle, He provided them with the skills they would need to get the job done, and He will do the same for me.(Exodus 35:30). I remember that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)
I am praying to remember that it is not my strength, but His, that will lead me through this next season. I am also praying for you, that you take a challenge that God may be whispering to you, so that you can set out on a journey equal to none you have done before. That even though you are nervous about your own ability to succeed, you give God a chance to prove Himself capable of leading you to new heights. Stop living safely, within the bounds of your own talents. March to a beat like no other, take God at His Word, and remember that He created you to impact your world for Him. By Him. Through Him.