Connor, 5, starts kindergarten next week. I have always joked that it would be the happiest, saddest day of my life. Right now it doesn't feel like a happy day coming. You know what I mean... you look forward to something that seems really far away, but when it is rapidly approaching you kind of start to dread it. I am trying not to convey those feelings to him. Instead, we are concentrating on making sure he is ready. Today we had "Lunch Box Training." I packed him a lunch and watched him figure out how to get it all set up himself, stepping in to help only when necessary. I have spent these last days of summer standing back and letting him figure stuff out for himself. Like how to play on a playground when other kids are there. Not easy to stay out of it sometimes.
On the other end of the spectrum, Alex, 19 (20 in three weeks), moves to LaCrosse at the end of this week. Since she is getting an apartment instead of living in the dorms this is the last time she really "has" to come home. I am also trying to make sure she is prepared and still stay out of the way, which is where she actually prefers me to be.
Life is just a juggling act sometimes. Making sure everybody is equipped for what they need to do. I know there are probably many Biblical truths and analogies in here to draw from. But as my heart is heavy sending my babies out into the world, I just need to take a breath, smile, and rest in the arms of my Father, Who probably feels the same way about me.