Friday, January 9, 2009

Trying Too Hard?

I am tired right now. I am really wanting to have a deep thought to share, but the flesh is weak. My Spirit is willing. The phrase "Go back to your First Love" is echoing in my brain, but my eyes are drooping. I try to sit quiet and pray, then realize my neck hurts because my head has fallen to my chest. I feel like I should be pondering the 'unplowed ground' part of our family verse, like God is trying to shake me out of a routine, a habit. Like He is saying, "Would you put everything else down and just look at Me?" Do you ever feel like you hide behind routines, books about God, Bible studies, and miss the One we are taking the long way around to meet up with?


  1. Yep, too often.

    I think sometimes in our busyness, we have to intentionally schedule those intimate times, but God met you at your computer last night. He saw your heart...

  2. Always. Or at least nearly always. At salvation, it was God and I sitting across the table from each other, wrestling it out. It was He and I, and He won.

    Lately, it's more like I'm reading something about Him, thinking a thought towards Him, and generally hearing about Him through gossip and third-parties.

    It was about 1 year ago I told a younger believer than I that we are given EVERYTHING at the time of salvation, and then religion and tradition and habit and life and self gets in the way.

    Eventually, we spend the rest of our lives trying to get back to that day we sat across the table from Him and wrestled with Him - when He won.